Reclaiming yourself through travel
As you start your first solo travel, you might notice straight away that, suddenly you can hear yourself think for what feels like the first time in years. And it can be deeply, wildly uncomfortable. For about a day. And then it's the best thing that's ever happened to you.
You get a front-row seat to your own inner monologue, running uninterrupted, with nobody around to nudge it in a different direction. And what I discovered somewhere around a solo dinner in a country where I don't speak the language, is that a worrying amount of that inner voice isn't actually mine. It's a highlight reel of everyone else's opinions, playing on a loop as if it were my own personal wisdom.
“You should see the main square, everyone says it's a must. You can't skip the famous viewpoint, you'll regret it. Three days here isn't enough, you need at least a week to "do it properly."“
Whose voice is that, exactly? Because on day four, alone, with nothing but your own company and a very good pastry, I promise you it starts to sound suspiciously like a group chat you're not even in anymore.
Why you never end up taking that solo trip
You’ve thought about it. Maybe you’ve spent hours looking at flights, saved hotels on Instagram, created a Pinterest board, and even told your friends: “I think I’m going to travel on my own this year.” You can almost picture yourself there. Having a coffee somewhere beautiful. Waking up with nowhere to be. Meeting people from all over the world. Finally doing the things you’ve been putting off.
And yet… you still haven’t booked the flight. You keep telling yourself you’ll do it when you have more time, when work calms down, when you’ve saved a little more money, when you feel more confident, when you find the right destination. And somehow, weeks turn into months. I’ve seen this happen with women I’ve spoken to about solo travel, and I completely understand why. Wanting to travel alone and actually committing to the trip are two very different things. Sometimes, the biggest obstacle isn't the destination, the money or even safety. It’s everything that happens in your head between “I’d love to do this” and “I’ve booked my flight.”